Mangoes World

Welcome to the world of Ms M Mango


So this is Christmas

It’s finally approached my most hated time of the year.

The older I get the more I realise what exactly it is that I hate about Christmas. On the fundamental level, Christmas for me is forced happiness. It is forced by a variety of differentiating factors.

Forced happiness is developed through a variety of mediums of exposure. From December the 1st, when you walk into the big-chain supermarkets, the torturous Christmas Carol album has been completely flogged to death by the repeat button. The only joyous moment is your actual departure and the mutilation of your ears finally ceases.

What is more poignant is the fact that artists make Christmas albums before their imminent death from the music scene. Oh Mariah, please sing ‘rum a pum pum’ one more time whilst I can still breathe. It is at this point that I can feel only compassionate to the workers at the checkouts. 38 hours a week of Christmas tunes would ultimately destroy my capacity to function.

Forced happiness at Christmas time is not a reality for many Australians. Obviously the peer pressure of presents and ‘family get togethers’ only highlight the fact that a happy Christmas is not realty.

Which leads me to my second point, the widespread commercialisation of Christmas as a source of budgeted income for retailers.

This is what ultimately disgusts me the most. Christmas today is so far removed from its foundations, that no longer is the family gathering the focal point for the holiday. How many Christmas celebrating Christians actually attend a church ceremony?

How can I celebrate something that I do not believe in? What’s worse is the tremendous expenditure of Christmas hooligans in the hunt the perfect gift. Before you know it, you’ve spent $100s on gifts that might not ever be used. I believe that Christmas shouldn’t be about gifts, and expensive presents should be savored for birthdays.

Then there are the Boxing Day Sales, which aim only to insult this theory further. People scramble into stores for the perfect sale, and leave with empty wallets, and much less faith than they came with.

My frustration with Christmas not only is centered on materialization and forced happiness, but on the day itself. Life practically ceases and people are consumed in the celebrations of the day. For me, I’m stuck. Constrained by the closure of life itself. And it is for this reason that I endeavor to be abroad each year.

I often ponder, that perhaps when I have kids, I might actually enjoy the day. But at the moment, the joy of Christmas is nothing but a burden on my mind. Its desolate destruction from its original meaning is frustrating and fraudulent. It is ourselves that need the reality check.

And where the hell did Santa Claus come from?? He was an Americanization of the St Nicholas character that was ultimately solidified in the years following the 1920s by Coca Cola.

Australians reject the Americanization of Halloween, as adopted from the ancient Celtic festival of Samhain, as it has manifested itself into a secular celebration of ‘trick or treating’ and costuming. So how has this over sized bearded man managed to slip into the homes of millions?

Globalisation is the answer. Globalisation of the Coca Cola products has ever adapted the face of Christmas into a subliminal message about the drink itself. Although Australian’s do not see the snowy Christmas of our European and American counterparts, we are still as much addicted to the commercialization of the day. The scorching temperatures of the Australian Christmas, only see us to purchase the cola flavoured drink to quench the first.

So in 2012, we are left with particles of the real meaning of Christmas wrapped only by the insane expenditure of gift giving slaves. Perhaps my theories would be less prevalent if I had the millions to spend, but I wholesomely doubt that the gifts I purchase would have any more emotional value.

The pressure of the festive season only leads me further into dissociation with the celebration itself. So until the time in which Christmas actually means something to me other than the burden of forced happiness and solid commercialization, I will still remain detached to the celebration as a whole.
“Be only what you believe in.”

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Where to from now?

The older I get the more and more I begin to people watch. I’m not sure if it’s the result of my surroundings changing or the fact that I am becoming more critical of myself? And in developing criticism I am hoping to foster the creation of my own personal identity.

I would like to think that ‘we’ as people share common identities based around our geographical location. This meaning that we have been exposed to a variety of circumstances and experiences that make us similar. So what makes us different?

The reaction to certain situations controls our overall identity. I have spent the last two years really trying to define what it is or where it is I am going. I have come up with the following conclusion: decision-making is not my forte and that in a general sphere I have learnt to accept others for who they are.

Last night I witnessed the crazy. A young girl pinning a male up against the wall and berate him over the fact he was a) speaking with us and b) had only spoken 150 words to her all day. On further clarification of the situation it was omitted that they had kissed two times previously and she was dealing with a terminally ill parent. What I ask is, why does it make it socially acceptable to own someone you do not have emotional ties with?

And the very sad thing is that this is common. Are we as females so insecure that we need a man to make us feel good? Are men the much needed accessory of the month??

So what type of man do you want? Last night I met a gorgeous young man who was wearing a horrible flowered shirt circa 2004. Of course I began to ask him what he does, between slurring of the words he was able to say that he does Commerce and Marketing at Uni, works in retail and is a model. Jackpot!! However I’m nearly 26, at this point in my life a 20 year old student is not what I want. He did say he would give me a discount if I came into Ralph Lauren. I declined as Ralph Lauren is a label I’d wear into my 50s. He also offered that it was “like working with your mates and having fun”. I mentioned I worked for Morrissey. He only knew them post-recession and didn’t know they made clothes. So 20!!

So I felt old. But it did remind me of my life back then. And I am committing myself to more happiness now. Approaching 27 is now on the horizon and it comes with two realms of possibilities. The 27 Club and the return of Saturn. I don’t think I will lay victim to the 27 Club but the return of Saturn is inevitable. For those of you who are unfamiliar with either concept visit this page

So what changes might this new cycle bring? I believe that girls of 18 do not want the same thing as 21 and then change that again at 25. All of this developing and growing has to do with maturity and experience. Which leads me back to my first point of people watching. How is it that some people manage to make major insecure mistakes? Is it nature or is it nurture?

The only conclusion I can develop is that I do not want to be that girl who spontaneously turns up at places after reading a crush’s Facebook page. I do not want to be that girl who overreacts to situations and becomes more trouble than I’m worth. I just want to be that carefree easy-going person who exerts confidence within myself.

Finally I believe that no one can tell you how beautiful, friendly or loving you are. That it must come from inside you. That way no one can take it from you.



Welcome back to reality

After the most amazing holidays, it’s nice to be back in town. Well sorta. I am not enjoying the anti-summer weather that Melbourne has been experiencing. The torrential downpours have almost flooded everywhere.

Since being back in Australia, I have been lucky enough to enjoy my final moments of the holidays. Flying on Tiger Airlines to the Gold Coast is one of the most daunting and horrible experiences. The unreliability of their planes and booking system, makes flying with Tiger less than enjoyable.

Upon arrival to the Gold Coast, I was greeted by Mr Dover. This time, and for the first time in ages.. his haircut was good. I know I’m fussy, but I like him to look handsome always. Dover works in the afternoons, so I was being picked up by Georgie and taken to Ewan’s for dinner. Which I might, add.. was delicious.

During my stay in QLD, I planned to go to Big Day Out with the crew. I like musical festivals in QLD. I like them because the chance of seeing students is low, and they always go in a big group of people. Memorable moment: Ramstein– the ultimate crackhead. I will never understand his brutal shows, filled with blood and guns. Did he receive enough hugs when he was little? Does someone love him now?

Getting back to Melbourne, made me embark of a journey of cleaning. I bleached everything in my entire house, and then continued the bleaching into Bam’s house. I was officially the ‘White Queen’.
I struggled with finding enough places for all of my clothes to fit in my wardrobe. I had purchased 40 new coat hangers, and filled them all. I can not move them along at all. It’s great to have a new closet, but at the same time I am fairly confused with how to make more space. Linz and I have committed to wearing a new item each day until we run out. She predicts that we will be able to make it well and truly into March.

The hardest thing about holidays is actually returning to work. According to Spanna, “If you ask a teacher if they like their job, the only time they will happily say yes, is during the holidays.” I believe this to be correct. The holidays are great while they last, but if you think realistically, we have already worked them well and truly before we get them.

Waking up at 6:30am is a shock to the system. Also having to concentrate with meetings for an hour is hard. You know that in a couple of days, the kids will be back and we will all be back into it. The only way I am able to survive is by having an afternoon powernap to settle the soul. Only then can I work till 12am with Bam.

The floods of the 4th of February were hideous. I am surprised that my car didn’t flood in the Beach Rd river. Luckily for us, we only had flooding in the bathroom and considering the house is getting knocked down, it’s not really a concern. Shemu wanted to check that his room was fine, before we used our car/boat to grab dinner. I am so happy to see such a green state, but the damage of the flash flooding is less than desired.

I have set myself goals for this year:

  • pay off c/c by April
  • stop working so much
  • be fitter, strong and healthier
  • save money
  • sleep more than 6 hours a night

I’m looking forward to catching up with old friends this weekend.. for my birthday.. 

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Do YOU like Pina Coladas?

The beginning:

And this is where myself and Miss Linz are headed. To the land of Pina Coladas!!

Melbourne has provided us with the worst weather for summer in ‘ages’. It’s hideous! There is no notion of ‘the light at the end of the tunnel’ if in fact there is no light to begin with. I have however been secretly working on my tan, with the aide of ‘Dove’ in a bottle tanning lotion and a quick five minutes at the Queen Victoria Market. I am not fearful because tonight Linz and I embark on our first full fledged journey (together) abroad.

The Plan:

Fiji for a couple of nights, to warm up and refresh the soul and then onwards to Hawaii, before hitting Fiji again on the way back.

The Disappointment:

The original plan was to go to Guatemala, but with the predicted cost of flights at approximately $5000 each, we both had decided that it was probably not the best financial decision.

The Aim:

At this point the only things we have agreed on so far are the 4 S’s; Sailors, Shopping, Sightseeing and Sunbaking. Although Linz is going to leave most of the sunbaking up to me, as she prefers an umbrella in the shade. I intend to write some chapters of my novel as well as escape into the mind of Russell Brand- My Booky Wooky. Linz on the other hand, has some reading of her own. We both agree that ‘working’ as such is to disappear. This is going to be a difficult task, as it will only be a matter of time before Bam emails me with something that needs fixing. I give it five days.

In terms of purchases, I intend to make one/two in the Leather Jacket department, and hopefully Zara will be able to supply me with one of those. Emma has requested and since the whole ‘eyelash’ refills for your birthday idea fizzed, the jacket will fill the void nicely. I also intend to purchase a handbag, this is in response to the ‘cat piss’ incident of 2010, where my Mimco handbag was destroyed by a little squirter. Unfortunately I was a little distracted, and the little urine attack happened right under my nose.. I did enjoy fishing out my wallet and keys and thank the higher power for not allowing the fluid to ruin my SONY touch screen camera. The last on the list of purchases (besides the Tiffany and Co visit) will be dresses, something to look pretty in, when the Melbourne weather warms up. I am trying not to purchase work wear, but we will see how we go.

We also aim to prove Silva wrong and not have a fight or end up hating each other. In times of crisis I shall return to Russell for enlightenment.

The Timeline:

So basically we won’t be back till the 16th of January, which gives me enough time to get my head around doing nothing.

The Mission:

I am not to return without at least one contact for Bam. Interestingly enough I am not sure how to ease into it.. but I will do my best.


I am going to miss a few things about this hectic life, but seriously I am only gone for three and a half weeks.. and then I hit the Gold Coast to visit MR DOVER and MUCKY.

Stay tunned…

Adios Amigos!!